Warrior Maid
by distraught.hallelujah
Summary: AU. Sasuke Uchiha, second son of the king and heir to the throne of Konoha, must be kept in the dark about his banished and sullen older brother's attempts on his life. His somewhat mysterious new personal maid full of uncalled-for dry humor and wit is there to help, but when Itachi comes for Sasuke himself, even his maid may not be able to protect him.
1. In Which Towel Animals Are Outlawed

**Mwahahahaha! I have finally created a story that I will put up chapter by chapter over the course of weeks (which I have never done before) because I have found my inner ebilness and shall make my readers SUFFER! Bask in my power... or read the story. You'll have to wait for the next chapters, though! Mwahahahaha... hahahha... haha... ugh... anyway, I have a certain soft spot for reviews, so please don't hesitate to leave a little 'Kilroy Was Here!' Constructive criticism welcome as well!  
**

* * *

Rain _pitter-patter_ed on the cobblestone street. The prince was frozen on his knees where he had fallen, his eyes wide. He saw the arrow make contact with her flesh, he saw the blood drip from her mouth, and he saw her fall in slow motion to the ground. His mind was blank. He could no longer fathom what happened in front of him. _It_ _has_ _to_ _be_ _a_ _dream_, he thought. _There_'_s_ _no_ _way_ _it_ _can_ _be_ _real_. He fell to his knees, into the water, as though following her descent.

She hit the ground with a splash, and the prince felt the cold ripples from the puddle reach his knees. His eyes stayed locked on his best friend who lay broken on the ground, her eyes vacant. Her mouth was open in a silent scream, and the feathered shaft of the arrow was just level with the ground. Her arm dangled limply at her side, her hand still tightly closed around her katana as her fingers trembled slightly, whether because of the pain or because of postmortem muscle spasms, the prince could not tell.

The prince was numb. He could feel nothing, could think nothing. All he could do was watch, standing frozen. She had given her life for him, for the person who had made her life miserable. How could he forget that? How could he ever forgive himself, now that she was gone because of him? Feeling returned to his limbs, and he paid no mind to the tears that coursed down his face as he crawled on his hands and knees, trembling, to her side.

* * *

You look lost. Are you lost? It's your entire fault for jumping in at the end of a story. A good narrator always relates the story how it happens from beginning to end, so you'll have to bear with me. What? What? Stop asking me questions! What do you mean, 'what do you mean by 'prince'?' If you had been listening, you would know, but no, you had to jump right in when I was already at the end. You're a poor listener, you know that?

All right, fine. To spare your merciless questioning, I'll start all the way back at the beginning. Are you happy now? I'm going out of my way for you, a complete stranger who's also very rude. Did you know that? You're rude. I'm calling you rude. What do you mean, get on with the story? How rude, you know that? Why, I should just up and leave without telling you my favorite story. To be quite honest, you don't deserve it. What's the magic word? Say it or I'm not starting back at the beginning. Come on, say it. Say it…

That's better. *sigh* All right, here I go. Ready? You'd better pay attention this time. Such a witty and eloquent narrator has never been known, so I hope you can appreciate this. Even rude and vulgar 'Twilight' readers such as yourself should be able to see a good romance when you see one, although, on second thought, seeing as you probably enjoyed 'Twilight,' maybe not. All right, here I go. What do you mean, I said that already? Just be silent and listen, will you? Once upon a time…

* * *

Once upon a time, in a brilliant prosperous land called Konoha, there lived the royal Uchiha family. This royal family consisted of the king, the queen, and two sons. Now, as you can probably imagine, having two heirs caused a bit of strife among the family, which was stupid because everybody knows the firstborn gets the throne, end of story. The firstborn and heir to the throne, Itachi Uchiha, wanted the throne quite badly, and he was impatient.

Now, he was a sociopath and insane, so you really couldn't trust a word he said. He would also do anything to get the throne sooner than his father's death, which was the law. Therefore, he came up with a simple way to get the throne, and all he had to do was kill his father. It was simple enough, and that way his worthless little brother would be left in the cold. To Itachi, this idea seemed perfect.

Oddly enough, some people disagreed. I know; weird, right? Apparently some of the villagers didn't want Itachi Uchiha to be king, or at least not by killing his father to assume the throne. Anyway, somehow the news of his plot leaked out, and King Fugaku heard of it. As you can imagine, he was heartbroken that his firstborn would attempt something like this.

Due to the laws of the country, Itachi Uchiha was banished and the younger son, Sasuke Uchiha, was named the new heir to the throne. Now, if only Sasuke wasn't also a sociopath, we might actually be getting somewhere here. Sadly, it runs in the family. Anyway, to continue the story, this scowling egotistical overemotional world-hating prince was now the heir to the throne.

That didn't mean that Itachi was about to give up, though. Though it was kept a desperate secret from the prince, numerous attempts on his life were committed. Itachi was probably working under the assumption that it there was no heir besides the original firstborn, then he'd have to become king regardless of cousins or nephews, even if he was technically eternally shamed and doomed to die outside of the country.

It was all very technical, though, so he assumed he still had a chance.

Anyhow, after a while, some of the attempts on the young prince's life got pretty close until his parents couldn't stand it anymore. They decided to hire a personal bodyguard, hoping that a personal bodyguard would not fall to suicidal tendencies or murderous intents like the prince's past personal maids had. The only person they could think of was if they applied to the Guild of Warriors to send over a member to serve as a bodyguard for a top-secret mission.

This is how he got a new attendant.

* * *

"Who the heck are you?" Sasuke demanded upon entering the room as he slammed the door behind him. He glowered at the girl who stood hunched over the fireplace. She looked up suddenly, the poker in her hands. Her face broke out in a smile and she dropped the poker immediately and bowed deeply at the waist.

"Excuse me, my lord. I had assumed you would not return from riding until later today. I was hired by your parents as your new maid, so it will be my job from here on to attend to your every need and whim. My name is Aoko, at your service," the maid said cheerfully.

"Okay," the prince said slowly. "Where did my last maid go?"

"I'm afraid she had to leave quite suddenly after she was found attempting to poison your tea and was caught by the cook," Aoko said woefully. The truth was, unusually enough, that the maid had not been hired to do it by the jealous older brother as you might think (see above). She'd had enough of the spoiled little prince and was quite willing to do away with him herself.

"I see." Sasuke's frown deepened.

"Is there anything you'd like at the moment, milord?" Aoko continued.

"No," the prince said quickly.

"You seem to have slipped in the mud," Aoko noted. "Would you like me to help you change into something dry, and I will take your clothes down to the laundress to have them scrubbed, washed, and dried?"

"No," the prince said quickly, aghast. No maid had ever helped him undress before – that, at least, he could do by himself.

"No, thank you, if you please, sir," Aoko said reproachfully. The prince blinked. Had he actually just been corrected by a mere chambermaid?

"Out," the prince ordered, walking stiffly back to the door and opening it wide for her. The maid smiled and nodded and nodded and smiled, but she made no move to leave.

"Did you not hear me?" The prince demanded.

"I heard you, milord, but I am not finished attending to the fire," Aoko explained. She bobbed a quick curtsy. Her dark hair framed her face down to her shoulders, but in the back her hair was much longer and separated into two long braids that trailed down her back. She wore very little makeup, just some purple dust over the lash-line of her eyelids, thick black lashes framing brilliant blue eyes, and white powder brushed very lightly over her tanned face, as was the custom.

She wore the usual maid's garb, a black dress with complements of white lace and a high rounded neckline. The bodice was fitted with long tight sleeves, and a white apron ran around her waist, the ends trailing down over the back of her mid-calf-length skirt. On her feet she wore white socks and flat black shoes. The prince realized that she was tall, about his height if not taller, and if she wore heels she would easily be taller than he was.

"You can do that later," Sasuke said, scowling. He nodded to the door. "Get out."

"Oh, but if you were to catch a cold, my lord, I would be punished terribly for causing it by allowing the fire to go out," Aoko said as she hastily piled three more logs into the generous fireplace. She snatched the poker from the ground and put it back in its place, and then hitched up her skirts and raced across the room to the door in a hurry.

She paused momentarily to bow to the young prince, and then disappeared out the door. Still scowling, the prince began to undress. He would leave his mud-covered clothes at the foot of his bed, and not allow the maids in until the mud was nicely caked onto both the clothes and the bed. Extra work would keep them busy and give them something to do, after all.

It was this kind of thinking that made the prince rather unpopular among the maidservants, cooks, and gardeners, although the stable boy had taken a liking to the young prince. The horses were another story – he had been thrown from his newly appointed least favorite stallion just today, which would account for the muddy garments.

The prince wrapped the fluffy white dressing gown around himself and headed into the bathroom to take a bath, as he was feeling dirty. As he entered the room, he was nearly blinded by the sparkling brilliance. The mold in the corner of the tub was gone, the streaks even at the tippy top of the mirror had been rubbed off, and even worse, the white towels were gone, replaced by a hand-folded towel tortoise, grinning up at him most malevolently. The prince was shocked.

He whipped around and raced back to his bed to yank the bell-pull near the head of the bed. Almost as soon as he let go of the rope, the door opened and Aoko was standing there, head bowed, as sickeningly cheerfully as ever.

"You called, milord?" She asked smoothly.

"What did you do to my bathroom?" The prince demanded. Aoko looked up to meet his eyes, a brave feat.

"I cleaned it, sir," she murmured. "Should I not have done my job? I changed the sheets and made the bed, beat the carpet, dusted the ceilings, gave the bathroom a thorough cleaning, and even fluffed your pillows. Is it not to your liking?"

"There's a turtle!" Sasuke exclaimed, aghast.

"If you're referring to the towel animal I folded in the bathroom, it's actually a tortoise, but yes, milord," Aoko said, looking slightly puzzled. "Would you like me to draw your bath for you or perhaps fetch your tea?"

The prince had never met such a devilishly innocent one as this. This maid defied all laws of maid physics. She cleaned things! And worse, she made cute animals out of the hand towels! Surely that was against the laws of the land? If not, the prince made a mental note to change that as soon as he became king.

"Never mind," he said, turning abruptly. "You may go."

"Yes, milord," Aoko said, bowing deeply. Rather than backing out of the door, she walked into the room to fetch the muddy clothes that the prince had left at the foot of his bed.

"You can leave those," the prince said coolly. Aoko bowed and turned to go. The prince turned back to the bathroom and, when he had looked back, both Aoko and the muddy clothes had disappeared.

The prince marched into the bathroom, and the door slammed behind him.

* * *

Dirty clothes in hand, Aoko headed down the hall slowly, her eyes peeled for any suspicious behavior. That was her job, after all. As she passed by a room, she paused momentarily and her eyes darted down to the threshold. Shadows moved slightly from inside the room. Aoko carefully moved the clothes to one arm and reached forward for the doorknob with her other hand.

The door quietly swung open, and Aoko entered the room. It was dark inside except for the light coming from the window on the opposite side of the room, and rather eerily silent. Aoko crossed the room to the mantle of the empty fireplace in this room and took the large ceramic vase that sat there. Then she smoothly made her way to the bed and got on it without making a sound.

She waited for a moment in silence, standing as still as a statue. Then a dark head appeared from under the bed. Aoko reached both arms out. She let the vase fall.

There was a smashing sound, and it was a job well done. Aoko hopped off the bed and leaned over to drag the unconscious would-be assassin out from underneath the bed. _For_ _an_ _exiled_ _prince_, she thought, _Itachi_ _Uchiha_ _sure_ _is_ _cheap_.

She yanked him by the shoulders and backed up until she had pulled him all the way out. She leaned over and grasped his arm, then hauled him over her shoulder and half-carried half-dragged him to the window. She peered over the edge and noticed immediately the well-positioned bushes. She looked around and finally spotted the gardener's apprentice, whom she had been introduced to only that morning along with the other servants.

"Ino!" She called. The young girl looked up from tending to the rose bushes, and Aoko hefted the unconscious man over the windowsill. "Catch," Aoko called, and let him fall. He landed in the bushes with a loud rustling sound, and the blond girl below looked surprised.

"Please get the guards to take care of him for me," Aoko called, still leaning over. "Thank you, Ino!"

Ino waved back and headed towards the bushes to get the man. Satisfied, Aoko turned away from the window, closed it so that no one else could get in and, clothes still in hand, left the room humming, a skip in her step.

* * *

"Another one?" Kakashi Hatake, a member of the Royal Guard, murmured as the blond gardener's apprentice, Ino Yamanaka, dropped the man at his feet. The apprentice wiped her hand across her brow and grinned.

"Aoko-san tossed him down from the window and said I should bring him to you to take care of him," she explained. "I leave it in your capable hands." She turned to go.

"Now just a minute," Kakashi said, stopping her. "Why is it that as soon as we bring in the exterminator, suddenly all the termites are popping up everywhere?"

"What?" Ino asked, frowning.

"Never mind," Kakashi said with a sigh. "You can tell Aoko-san that I'll bring him to the dungeons soon enough. Hopefully we'll be able to get something out of him before Guy sends him back to sweet dreams like the last assassin Aoko-san rooted out."

"Why are you still wearing that helmet?" Ino asked curiously, cocking her head. "I mean, it's all rusty. Shouldn't you get it polished?"

"I have bad helmet hair," Kakashi replied indignantly, reaching up to push his helmet more firmly onto his head. Ino shrugged and turned to go. She headed back towards the rose bushes she had been tending to earlier, before she had been so rudely interrupted by the falling assassin in her holly. _Being_ _a_ _gardener_ _is such_ _a_ _hazardous_ _job_, she thought, shaking her head as she headed down the path towards the back of the castle.

* * *

"Is it time for the prince's tea?" Aoko asked the cook curiously. She noted that the blond stable boy was eagerly slurping a bowlful of ramen from the long table in the kitchen. She looked back up towards the cook.

"Yes," Mr. Ichiraku replied. His daughter as well as cook's assistant, Ayame, smiled up at Aoko.

"It's almost ready," she promised. "If you'd like to wait for it, feel free to sit over there by Naruto and enjoy some hot ramen while you wait."

"Thank you," Aoko said gratefully as she went to sit at the table. Ayame put a bowl of ramen in front of her and Aoko thanked her and took up her chopsticks. The stable boy paused momentarily to look her up and down.

"You're Sasuke's new maid?" He asked.

"I am the prince's new maid, yes," Aoko replied, daintily lifting a bunch of noodles into her mouth. She chewed and swallowed. "I'm not sure I met you this morning when I met the others. You must have been out. Naruto Uzumaki, am I right? I hear you hang out at the kitchen on a regular basis, rather than tending to the horses like a stable boy should."

"Well, excuse _me_," Naruto grumbled, and went back to his ramen.

"Oh, we really don't mind," Ayame said, laughing. "Besides, no one enjoys our humble ramen quite as much as a hungry stable boy. Anyhow, the horses don't need care 24/7. Aoko-san, here's the tea. Feel free to take the tray up to His Highness immediately."

"Thank you." Aoko took the tray in her hands and picked up the empty cup thoughtfully. She examined the inside and rubbed her finger all the way around, then licked her finger carefully. Ayame, Naruto, and Mr. Ichiraku all watched curiously as she then lifted the steaming hot kettle of tea and sniffed the steam.

"What are you doing?" Ayame said finally.

"Checking for poison," Aoko replied as she gathered the tray again and turned to go. "You can never be too careful these days. I'll be pouring the tea myself, and if the prince dies from this tea, I would be one of the ones held responsible. Thank you, I will take the tea up to the young lord now."

Ayame watched her go and exchanged a glance with her father, who shrugged.

"She's right," he said. "There's no such thing as being too careful."

* * *

There was a polite knock at the door. Sasuke waited a moment, wondering if it was that old busybody of a maid again, and then called for her to enter. The door opened silently and the maid entered with a tray of tea in her hands. What did she say her name was again? Oh, right – Aoko something-or-other.

"You can put it over there," the prince said carelessly, gesturing to the small table in the corner of the room. He expected her to leave the tray, bow, and leave, but instead she crossed the room to where he was at the writing desk.

She placed the tray on the corner of the large desk and then began to pour the tea, seemingly ignoring the prince completely.

"If you're going to ignore me, you should do it while bowing," the prince said crossly. Aoko glanced at him.

"If it seemed like I was ignoring you, I am terribly sorry, milord. That was not my intention," she said as she put the kettle down and offered the prince the cup of steaming hot tea with both hands. The prince took it casually with one, ready to scream and toss the tea all over the maid, when his hand closed around the cup and it didn't burn him at all.

It was the perfect temperature, just how he liked it. Hot enough to warm his belly, but not hot enough to burn his tongue. Huh. Perhaps this new maid wouldn't be too bad after all.

"You may go," the prince said, gesturing for her to leave.

"Actually, young master, the king requested specifically that I accompany you outside for some fresh air today," the maid said, not budging.

"I went riding just this morning," the prince replied, scowling. "And don't call me 'young master.' Address me as 'Your Highness' or 'My Lord.'"

"Yes, my lord," Aoko said, bowing deeply. "However, His Highness the king said that your riding time today had been cut short due to a terrible fall, and therefore he would like you to get a tad more fresh air. I would suggest a picnic in the garden; the gardeners have been attending to the plants most diligently."

"It wasn't a terrible fall," the prince said indignantly. He watched curiously as the maid reached into the folds of her gown and pulled out a very small jar. She deftly unscrewed the lid and rubbed some of the herb-scented salve inside on her fingers. She raised a hand towards the prince's face.

Sasuke leapt back.

"What are you doing?" He demanded.

"My job," Aoko replied as she reached forward, held him in place with one hand, and smeared the salve over his cheek with her fingers. The prince made a face as the oily substance entered the small scratch on the side of his face that he had gotten from that morning's fall. Aoko released him and straightened up, then screwed the lid back on and replaced the small jar in whatever hidden pocket she had.

The prince reached up a hand to his cheek, which stung slightly.

"Please bear the pain, my lord," Aoko said. "The salve will close the wound quickly and keep any bacteria from entering the cut."

"I'm not scared of bacteria," the prince said loftily. He got up abruptly from his desk and headed to the door, snatching the coat that hung on a peg on the wall. "Well?" He asked, turning back to the maid. "Are we going outside or not?"

Aoko bowed, beaming, and collected the tea tray again. She lifted the prince's cup of tea from his desk and put it on the tray before following after the young lord.

He turned and headed ahead of her down the hall towards the castle door. He was scared, and he cursed himself for being scared. Why was he scared? His stupid thoughts betrayed him like a dog betrays its master. How? By telling him she smelled nice. Stupid subconscious.


	2. In Which Aoko's Physics Are Not Amusing

The prince watched emotionlessly as Aoko let a blanket tumble from her arms out onto the grass. She got onto her knees and spread it out so that it was a perfect square with no creases; crawling all over the blanket to make sure that it was perfect. She sat up and began brushing off any dirt or twigs that may have fallen on the blanket. Finally, she stood up to admire her handiwork.

The prince pulled up a chair.

"But, my lord," Aoko exclaimed, aghast, as the prince sat down deliberately and crossed his arms firmly. "When you're having a picnic, you must eat on a blanket spread out on the ground!" Aoko finished.

"Why must I?" The prince asked coolly. Aoko pursed her lips.

"It's physics, sir," she said as though it were obvious.

"No, it isn't," the prince said, scowling.

"Oh, but it is, my lord," Aoko replied, waggling a finger at him. "You see, it's been scientifically proven that the meal will be better enjoyed the closer you are to the ground, in other words, the place where the food grew up. It's the same reason employees get days off to visit their families, because they're homesick."

"What a load of rubbish," the prince said, shaking his head. "I'm here, aren't I? Now go get me a table."

"You might at least try saying 'please,'" Aoko said reproachfully. "It's not like you'll drop dead or something. Besides, I think you'll find people would much rather jump at the opportunity to serve you if you ask nicely and express your thanks afterward. People like for their hard work to be recognized, you know."

"You're getting paid," the prince pointed out. "Isn't that enough?"

"A simple act of thanks is valued more than a million ryo," Aoko replied. "A 'thank you' is an expression of gratitude from a person to a person, rather than from the pocket to the hand like some greedy slum."

"I could say the hand is happy but the pocket is not," the prince replied. "Having never felt so empty and left wishing for a coin, the pocket is left for want and the hand greedy for more."

"And this is why I'm not a governess," Aoko said, collapsing on the picnic blanket with a sigh. "I say, my old work used to be much more highly valued."

"Oh? What did you do?" the prince asked curiously. Aoko paused.

"Accounting," she replied. The prince frowned and Aoko smiled innocently. "I used to work for a good old doctor who put all his time into searching for a cure for cancer, but he died from liver cancer before he could complete his work. The irony of it all was too much for me, so I quit and became a nursemaid. After a while, I grew in popularity and finally went from the duchess's baby daughter's nursemaid to the prince's personal attendant."

"You mean Cousin Mariko?" The prince guessed, thinking of the newest addition to the royal family, his father's brother's two-year-old daughter Mariko.

"Yes, that's her," Aoko replied. "Adorable little girl, isn't she?"

"Sort of," the prince admitted grudgingly. Aoko watched him.

"Come on, try the blanket. It's delightfully cool," Aoko said, patting the blanket cheerfully. The prince frowned again.

"What, and share the blanket with a maid?" he asked. Aoko stood up and stepped to the side, nodding down at the blanket.

"Go ahead," she said. "I'll collect your lunch from the kitchens."

She turned to go.

"Maid," the prince said suddenly. Aoko looked back.

"I'm sorry," the prince said. "You know, about the old doctor," he finished hastily, so she wouldn't get the wrong idea about his apology. Aoko smiled.

"I'm sure he'd be very glad to hear that, young master," she said as she backed slowly away. "Very glad indeed…"

"What's with the spooky slow backing up?" Sasuke demanded. "Are you trying to give me a heart attack or something? And don't call me young master!"

"Or something," Aoko replied, her eyes glittering impishly. She saluted. "I'll be back with your lunch shortly, milord."

In a twirl of skirts, Aoko had disappeared around the corner of the castle, and the prince shifted on his picnic blanket. Darn old busybodies. There was nothing worse than a disrespectful maid, especially one that cleans and makes you sit on a blanket on the ground. How foolish.

"Oh!" Someone exclaimed from behind him. The prince turned slightly to see the blond young gardener's apprentice.

"What?" The prince asked crossly.

"Remember me? Ino Yamanaka?" She asked, pointing eagerly to herself. "I prune the bushes below your window in the afternoons sometimes, remember? You accidentally dropped something on me once?"

The prince remembered the occasion but, instead of telling her that it actually wasn't an accident, he made an effort to smile.

"Of course," he said. "I remember you."

Ino squealed and gave a little dance on the spot.

"I can't believe I'm meeting you in person," she said. "Just wait until I tell Sakura! Oh, she'll be so jealous!"

"Sakura?" The prince frowned slightly at the unfamiliar name.

"The royal physician's apprentice," Ino explained. "She's the one with the big forehead and bubblegum pink hair. Born that way, it would seem. Terribly unattractive."

"Oh. Her." The prince vaguely remembered who Ino was referring to.

"Where's your maid?" Ino asked, glancing furtively to the sides.

"Hopefully fetching me a table," the prince said. Ino frowned slightly.

"Why, whatever would you need a table for?"

"Forsooth," the prince scolded lightly. "I need it to eat my lunch on, of course."

"But, forgive my impudence, sire, but… are you not taking part in a picnic?" Ino's frown deepened slightly, and the prince sighed.

"Not you too," he said, mirroring her frown. Ino immediately bowed deeply.

"I didn't mean to offend, my lord," she simpered.

"Tell me," the prince said thoughtfully. "What is the difference between 'my lord' and 'milord,' if there is one at all? I have always wondered this."

"Er…" Ino's face looked pained as she tried to come up with a good witty answer.

"The difference," said Aoko's cheerful voice as she appeared bearing a tray of food at the end of the garden, "is that 'milord' is the hasty or more unrefined form of the same thing, my lord. It really doesn't matter which is used, as they are both in the same case and mean essentially exactly the same thing."

"That was fast," Sasuke commented.

"Part of the service, milord," Aoko said sweetly as she crossed the grounds to the cloth spread out on the ground.

"There you go again," the prince said, frowning. "You keep going between the two, just darting back and forth like a crazed duckling."

"Firstly, my lord, as I said before they're both essentially exactly the same thing," Aoko said. "Secondly, what relation should flitting back and forth have anything to do with a crazed duckling, unless perhaps you meant to say a hungry hummingbird, implying the flitting motion from flower to flower as it feeds?"

"They're both birds," the prince said dismissively.

"Getting rather chummy there, aren't you?" Ino asked stiffly. The prince and Aoko both looked up abruptly, and Ino blushed. "I meant… well, he is the prince, so a little more respect would be… you know, normal, or so I thought…"

"Yes, pray tell why is it that you treat me like an old friend rather than the heir to the throne of Konoha?" The prince asked, turning to Aoko.

"I don't believe in antisocial behavior spurred by rank," Aoko said, shrugging. "I am being quite respectful, my lord. Usually I am quite a vulgar young lady."

Ino smothered a shocked gasp.

"And yet you still pretend as though you're acting with the utmost respect as you disregard my commands and force-feed me tea," the prince pointed out.

"I did not force-feed you anything, milord," Aoko said, shaking her head. "It was your hand that brought the tea to your lips."

"And it was your eyes that stared me down until I took a sip, with a look implying that if I did not then the situation would become much worse than simply a maid bringing her young master some tea! I mean, prince, darn it! Don't you dare call me 'young master!'!"

"Please eat, milord," Aoko said cheerfully, shoving something into the prince's mouth with two fingers. The prince choked and spat it out onto the grass, glaring up at his maid.

"Are you trying to kill me?" He demanded.

"Feed you, milord," Aoko corrected, offering him another tidbit. The prince snatched the tray out of her hands.

"It's the same difference! Never before have I met a maid who could kill with a tray of food," he said distastefully.

"Oh, I could kill a man with just the tray, sir," Aoko said cheerfully. "No, scratch that; I could kill a man with just the food, if it's my cooking we're talking about here."

"Do you enjoy poisoning people?" Sasuke asked, staring down at the tray of food in his hands suspiciously.

"Oh, no, sir," Aoko said, shaking her head vehemently. "It was entirely unintentional, I assure you. Besides, that comes directly from the cooks. Better let the experts handle it, I always say!"

"So now I've been demoted to 'sir?'" The prince asked dangerously, frowning as he dropped the tray on the picnic blanket.

"I'll be going now," Ino said quickly, backing up. She turned and was gone in a flash, and Aoko stared after her.

"It seems you scared the gardener's girl, milord," she said reproachfully.

"Who are you to scold me? I could have you beheaded!" The prince shrieked.

"You wouldn't," Aoko responded confidently. "You like me."

The prince turned bright pink.

"I do not!" He spluttered. Aoko rolled her eyes.

"Please stop jumping to conclusions, milord. I simply meant you believe that I make a good maid. I must say, after failing etiquette, I wasn't sure how far I would get," Aoko said mournfully. "However, I was quite surprised to hear that you were not used to maids cleaning things. Perhaps your past experience has been purposefully limited, my lord…?"

"Just what are you implying by that?"

"Please calm down, my lord. Your heart will burst."

"My heart will burst? What do you mean, my heart will burst? If it does, you can blame yourself and only yourself for such foolish trivialities that somehow you felt the need to push into my face when I have a number of things on my plate already!"

"None of which you are eating, sir," Aoko said, nodding down to the nearly untouched tray of food on the blanket beside him. "That's top quality. I never ate anything like that in boarding school, I can tell you that much."

"It was metaphorical!" Sasuke exclaimed, putting his head in his hands. "How is it that you, a simple maid, can be so nonchalant when the prince is bursting apart at the seams?"

"Well, you see, milord, it was I who caused the prince to burst apart at the seams," Aoko replied cheerfully. "So of course it's easy for _me_ to stay calm. I would suggest meditation."

"I hate you!" The prince exclaimed finally, picking up a random thing from his plate and throwing it at Aoko, who dodged. "Leave me alone! I want to speak to my father and have you dishonorably discharged."

"Is it possible for a mere maid to be dishonorably discharged?" Aoko wondered aloud. The prince threw something else which she dodged seemingly effortlessly. He was prepared to throw another item, but she bowed deeply at the waist instead.

"I am terribly sorry to have offended you, my lord," she said curtly. "I assure you, it will not happen again. Please do not question my loyalty to you, and please also do not bring this matter before your father."

"That was quick," the prince grumbled, crossing his arms. Aoko smiled and sat down on the blanket beside the prince, gathering up her skirts and smoothing them over her knees. The prince scowled as Aoko cheerfully chose a strawberry from the prince's food tray and popped it into her mouth.

"I love strawberries," she said.

"That's nice, but really you should start worrying less about not having eaten enough strawberries and worry more about your neck," Sasuke replied coldly.

"I'm not worried about my neck too much," Aoko continued, popping a second strawberry into her mouth. "It'd be just as pretty without my head on top, is what I'm thinking."

* * *

The prince opened the door to his room and entered it, shutting the door silently behind him. He crossed the room slowly and headed to the bed, then fell on top of it.

"My lord, you're crushing me," said a muffled voice from beneath the covers. The prince leapt up as though he had been stung and was safely at the other side of the room within moments, staring in horror at the moving mound on his bed.

"What are you… how did you… didn't you come in behind…?" the prince stuttered. "What the heck are you doing in my bed?"

"Checking for bedbugs, sir," Aoko, for it was she, replied, pulling the blankets down and giving him a level look as she swung her legs over the side of the frame and stood up. "All's well," she added cheerfully.

"All is _not_ well," the prince sputtered. "You're like that monster from 'One Thousand Fathoms Under the Sea'! Popping up like that and all slimy-like and tentacley too…"

"It's 'Leagues,' sire," Aoko corrected reproachfully.

'Get out of my room!" The prince exclaimed, pointing. She bowed deeply.

"As you please, milord," she said. She walked past him, still facing him, her hands behind her back. She reached the door, bowed once more, and shut the door ahead of her as she backed into the hallway.

Aoko brought her hands in front of her and looked down at the length of rope she held in her hands, frowning. Thank heavens she had thought to check the bed for booby traps; otherwise her young master would've been strangled when he jumped on his bed. She let her arm fall and, rope in hand, headed down the hall to dispose of the evidence.

* * *

The next morning, the prince didn't bother getting out of bed. His head felt heavy, and he kept moaning. By the time Aoko entered the room to give him the wake-up call, the prince was completely hidden under his thick blankets and feeling sorry for himself.

"Oh, goodness," she murmured, putting her hand to her mouth. Instead of entering the room, she turned right around and left, shutting the door behind her. Somewhere deep inside the prince's mind, he had been half-hoping that she would storm and force him out of bed. He knew he had things to do. Oh, well. He supposed even a maid couldn't risk catching a cold. He couldn't just spend the entire day in bed though…

His thoughts were interrupted when the door opened once more and Aoko entered backwards, a bowl of cool water in her hands and a hand towel draped across her arm. Instead of the two braids and face frame in front, her hair was all dragged into a somewhat messy ponytail that the prince guessed had been thrown together. Without a word, Aoko crossed the room and sat on the edge of the bed, putting the bowl of water on the end table. She shook out the towel and began folding it methodically.

"What are you doing?" Sasuke wheezed, finishing with a pitiful cough.

"I'm caring for my young charge," Aoko replied, smiling, as she laid the cool towel over the prince's forehead. He wouldn't admit it, but it felt much better. He set his jaw.

"I don't need it," he said gruffly. Aoko watched him silently for a moment.

"I understand that you have a lot riding on your shoulders," she said quietly. The prince's eyes widened slightly. "After all," she continued. "You're just a child, destined to become a king. Nevertheless, something like a cold is not something you can storm in and order to back down, my lord. I'm afraid you'll be bedridden for a few days until it passes over."

"I'm not a child," the prince said, or tried to. It came out more like 'cough, cough, hack, sneeze,' but somehow Aoko got the gist of it. Instead of replying, she just smiled slightly.

"Guess how old I am," she said. The prince stared. Here he was, sick in bed, and his maid wanted him to guess her age. Was she insane? Or, rather, was she more insane than he had originally thought?

"Twenty-three," he guessed, humoring her for some reason unknown to him.

"Nope," Aoko said brightly. "I'm seventeen."

The prince's jaw nearly dropped. His eyes quickly searched her smiling face, the face that seemed mature beyond seventeen. Aoko kept smiling, ignoring his disbelieving stare.

"A lot of people think I'm an adult," she continued. "They say I'm mature for my age. I guess that may be the case. Nevertheless, I was hired as the prince's maid. I'm proud of what I've accomplished, but mostly for a reason I can't tell you. It's my job, so I'm doing it. However, even I'll admit that I am a child and that there are some things I can't do. No one can bring someone back from the dead, for instance."

"What does this have to do with my illness?" the prince asked, scowling. Aoko stood up wordlessly and pulled the cloth off of his head, then dipped it back into the water and wrung it out. She laid it over his forehead and straightened up. A small smile curved her lips, an impish look entered her eyes, and she tweaked his nose. The prince's scowl deepened, but before he could object, Aoko was at the door.

"Smile," she said, without looking in his direction. "You're rich. You're handsome. Someday everything you see will be yours. You don't have anything to scowl about, believe me. Smile, my lord. You'll see."

The door shut quietly behind the maid. The prince watched the closed door for a moment, his face a picture of distress. Whatever could she mean? Despite himself, he lay back in the pillows and tried to smile. The corner of his mouth twitched as his lips pulled away from his teeth. It was painful. The prince stopped trying, setting his jaw in his usual disapproving expression. She'd be back later. He could ask her what she meant then.

* * *

Aoko pushed a spoonful of warm chicken broth past Sasuke's unresisting lips. This was overdoing it, he thought, but he was somewhat enjoying the constant care. The cool washcloth on his forehead was changed every few minutes, and Aoko had fluffed his pillow a few times already. He was content in bed and was quite willing to stay there forever if it meant this kind of treatment. For some reason, however, Aoko kept glancing worriedly at the window, and she seemed tense. The prince had no idea why.

"What's wrong?" he asked finally. Aoko looked at him, the spoon in her hand jerking in surprise. Luckily, it was on its return trip and the prince was not any worse for wear.

"Nothing," she said, smiling. The prince could see that it was forced. "I was just looking for… well, I was actually looking for birds. It seems oddly quiet, don't you think?"

"No," the prince said truthfully. He didn't find anything strange about it.

"I thought so," Aoko murmured. She stood up. "Just my imagination," she said, grinning. "Your soup's gone cold, though. Let me go down to the kitchen and I'll get you some more. I'll be back before you can say 'tea cozy,' my lord."

"It's not cold—" the prince began, but his objections were useless. Aoko swept up and out of the room, taking the soup with her. The door shut soundly.

The prince sighed, snuggling deeper into his little nest. It didn't matter if she wanted to desert him too. He would just get a new maid, like all the others. Just because one maid wanted to leave didn't mean there weren't any who wouldn't. Sasuke was fine with that. They didn't like him, too bad. They didn't have to. He was the crown prince.

He was startled when there was a sudden sound like glass breaking, and the next thing he knew, the bowl of water by his bed shattered, the water inside splashing to the floor. The window opposite the prince's bed had shattered as well, one pane, leaving a small hole. The prince sat bolt upright, staring in horror at the bullet imbedded in the wall.

"Duck, my lord," said a familiar cheerful voice, before the prince was thrown clear out of bed as a small dark shape flew into him and scooped him neatly from his blankets. There was a second gunshot and then a few moments of silence as the prince realized that the heavy weight on top of him was a person.

"Aoko!" he exclaimed, more out of surprise than anything else. The maid's head lifted. She looked somewhat pained as she got to her knees, leaning against the bed.

"I'm sorry about that, milord," she said. "It seems the gardener was taking pot shots at the swans again and missed. I shall have to talk to him about that. This isn't the first time it's happened, you know… he's a terrible shot…"

"What are you talking about?" Sasuke demanded as he jumped to his feet, momentarily cured. "That was an assassin sent to get rid of me! Why the heck didn't my father warn me about this?"

"No, it was the gardener," Aoko corrected sweetly as she unsteadily got to her feet. The prince stared at her, wondering what could be wrong, before he noticed the torn sleeve on her right arm. The cloth was bloodied.

"You were hit!" he exclaimed in horror. Aoko smiled.

"Nothing but a flesh wound, sir. Believe me, I got worse from your father's dogs when I first came in search of a job and someone had left them in the yard. What are they, Great Dane/Doberman crosses? They must have the bite force of an alligator or something. Could've sworn the king was enjoying himself, at that…" Aoko trailed off as the prince's hands balled into fists.

"I'll have that gardener beheaded," the prince growled. Aoko began to object, but the prince interrupted her.

"You be silent," he ordered. "Get to the doctor and get that treated immediately. I will talk to my father about that incompetent gardener."

Before Aoko could stop him, all memories of his cold gone, the prince had stormed outside. Aoko had no choice but to head after him, out of the room, and make her way to the royal doctor. Blood dripped lightly down her arm, staining the sleeve of her uniform. She held her arm up to hopefully stop the bleeding, and tried to keep the look of pain on her face as neutral as possible. As luck would have it, she found the pink-haired physician's apprentice.

"Sakura-san," Aoko called. The girl turned around, noticed the blood, and looked shocked. Without saying a word, Aoko was hurried towards the royal physician's office as the prince headed in the opposite direction to the king's chambers.


	3. In Which The Truth Comes Too Late

Two weeks had passed sluggishly since the incident in the prince's bedroom, which wasn't nearly as bad as it sounded. I would suggest not using that exact line if you ever retell this story. That was a bad line. Let me rephrase that, please.

It had been two slow weeks since the attempt on the prince's life. The gardener had been fired, replaced by the gardener's apprentice, who was warned of the dangers of taking pot shots at the swans. However, Ino Yamanaka assured the king that she didn't even own a gun and that, unless he meant spitting watermelon seeds (which she wouldn't do either), there was no way she would take pot shots at swans.

Aoko's wound was healing quickly and neatly and so far there was no sign of infection. The relationship between her and the prince, whose cold improved remarkably quickly, did not change much in the following days, and the prince was as unthankful as ever. Though he wouldn't admit it, Aoko noticed that he had her doing less work and only work that could be done one-handed. Somewhere deep inside, Aoko knew that it was an improvement, however small it was.

At this exact moment in time, however, I find it important to skip to a place rather far from the castle. It was, in fact, located just outside of the town. This particular place was where the banished prince and those loyal to him stayed. He was supposed to have left the country, but you know how banished princes are. Right now, the prince was somewhat upset. Itachi Uchiha had lost a handful of his men to some maid. He was not in a good mood.

"If you want something done right," he murmured to himself from his spot in the chair set up in the middle of a dimly lit room that served as the throne room. "You have to do it yourself." He finished. He stood up, his dark eyes flashing in what little light there was. He swept aside his black robes patterned with red clouds, the coat worn by members of his resistance. Then he called his men to his side. Today would be the day. That little prince sitting pretty with his bodyguard would fall.

* * *

"Good morning, my lord," Aoko said, as cheerful as ever, as she opened the curtains with one hand. Her right arm was up in a sling. It was rather awkward to open heavy silk curtains with one hand, and the hand that was not your dominant hand at that, but she did it. That day, it was rather dreary no matter how cheerful the maid wishing you good morning was. Water dripped from the roof and rippled down the outside of the window. Luckily, the castle was not a leaky old shack, because then they'd be in trouble.

"'Morning," Sasuke replied distractedly from his spot in the bed, sitting up amongst the fancy pillows. Aoko crossed the room and went to the prince's dresser to collect clothes for him.

"I think I'd like to go riding today," the prince said suddenly. Aoko glanced up, outside, at the gray clouds covering the sky and doubtfully listened to the sound of rainfall.

"Maybe tomorrow, sire," Aoko suggested, putting the clothes over her arm and shutting the drawer. She headed back to the bed and laid the clothes at the foot of the prince's bed.

"I want to visit town," the prince said. Aoko looked up, startled.

"Why, whatever for, my lord?" she asked.

"I'll own it someday," the prince replied. "I want to see what needs changing so that I can plan ahead. I've already got some things on my list, besides banning towel animals, but the list is pretty short and I think it needs to be longer." Aoko watched the prince for a moment in silence.

"All right then," she said. The prince glanced at her. "I'll take you," she said, smiling. "No horses, though, not in town. You'll have to go on foot, because sadly you don't own a carriage. Make sure you dress warmly, then. We wouldn't want you to catch a cold. If you caught a cold, I'd have to do embroidery to pass the time, and to be honest, I'm terrible at it."

Despite himself, the prince laughed.

"Well, I can't sew at all," he pointed out. Aoko headed to the door.

"Neither can I," she said with a wink. She left, shutting the door behind her. Sasuke watched the door for a moment before crawling out of bed and, instead of collecting the clothes at the foot of his bed, knelt and reached under his bedside table. He came up with a little box of some sort and straightened up, sitting on the edge of his bed. He opened the box with a _click_.

Inside, a glass butterfly pendant sparkled cheerfully in the gray light that streamed through the window. The prince touched the pendant thoughtfully. He had heard from another maid that Aoko's birthday was coming quite soon, and he wanted to be prepared. It wasn't a birthday present, he kept telling himself. Just a little… thank-you for the good work. Shaking his head, he shut the box once more and hid it back underneath the table. It was surprisingly difficult to hide something from a maid, but after careful thought, he had found the one place Aoko didn't clean. He would've hid it in his underwear drawer, but sadly Aoko dug into there, too – every morning without fail.

Finally, the prince began getting dressed, but for some reason he kept glancing out the window. It was like… like something called him, dared him to leave the castle. He was planning on taking a walk anyway, with Aoko or not didn't matter. Rain on his parade didn't matter either. He wasn't scared of something as pitiful as rain.

* * *

Aoko opened an umbrella over the prince's head. Since she only had one arm available, she only had enough arms for one umbrella, which meant that (and this the prince noticed) she didn't have an umbrella for herself. In reply, the prince decided that he could, in fact, hold his own umbrella, and did so.

Startled as the umbrella was snatched out of her hands, Aoko stared at the prince, who refused to meet her eyes as he haughtily faced away from her with the umbrella. Aoko smiled slightly and pulled out a second umbrella, which she opened and held over her own head.

"Straight ahead, milord," she said. "I'll follow your lead, since I have no idea where we're going. Look out for cars and please stay on the sidewalk. It would be somewhat ironic if first you were mistaken for a swan and then you got hit by a car."

"When was I ever mistaken for a swan?" Sasuke scoffed, starting the walk with his shoulders back and his head held high. Aoko splashed after him.

"Well, what do you think the gardener thought you were?" she retorted. "A pigeon?"

"It's over anyway," the prince grumbled. "He's long gone. End of story."

"Right. I'm sorry," Aoko said. She hung her head pitifully.

The walk down the road leading the castle was somewhat quick and very silent except for the sound of their wet footsteps. Once they had made their way down to the town entrance located below the castle, somehow Aoko felt the need to mention something else.

"And no window shopping."

The prince turned to face her.

"I'm not a girl," he said distastefully. "I don't… _window_ _shop_."

"Even if you saw a puppy?" Aoko challenged slyly.

"_Especially_ if I saw a puppy," the prince said. "Those things just eat and bite and poop and eat some more and get mud on the carpets."

"Huh," Aoko said thoughtfully. "Funny, if I didn't know we were talking about puppies, I'd think you were describing yourself."

The prince shot Aoko a disapproving look, but he was actually having quite a bit of fun. None of his other maids provided such interesting conversation. They just said, 'oh, yes, my lord' and 'of course, Your Highness' and never contributed anything. Of course, Sasuke wasn't too sure that calling him a dog was much better than that.

"You do strike me as more of a cat person," Aoko continued.

"Mud _and_ hairballs," the prince said meaningfully.

"Turtles?"

"About as interesting as a wooden rocking horse is to a thirty five-year-old."

"Talking parrot?"

"I had one once. His name was Chatterbox. I killed him in a state of half-sleep while he was in the middle of singing Beethoven. It was officially labeled an accident."

"Sheesh. Oh, a goldfish – have you ever had a goldfish?"

"He drowned," the prince finished. He looked up at the shop window as they passed by. His gaze lingered for a moment on the dress in the shop, with the thought (which he deemed foolish later) that it would have looked good on Aoko.

"Please tell me I imagined that," Aoko said matter-of-factly. The prince dragged his gaze away from the dress and set them firmly back on his feet.

"I was just thinking mom has one just like it," he grumbled, a lie of course. There were some things that nobody, including Aoko, needed to know. This was one of those things. The prince's hand moved to his pocket, where the little box sat comfortably nestled in the fabric at his hand. He had wanted to give Aoko her birthday present somewhere away from the castle where rumors spread like a cat's paws across a buttered ballroom floor.

If anyone from the castle saw something like that, he'd have his father at his arm giving that wink and nudge that he had gotten from his older brother at the playground when he was little and had realized for the first time that girls were marginally more attractive than a guinea pig (which was the one pet he didn't object to). He had never heard the end of it. Until, of course, his brother was banished and the problem was therefore solved.

"Look out!"

Aoko's umbrella went flying into the air, and Sasuke felt a rush of air before he was slammed to the side and, through the ringing in his ears, heard a warning honk and the sound of rubber against wet cobblestones fade away. There was heavy breathing that he somehow could not ignore right by his ear. He looked up and met the familiar warm blue eyes (_how is_ _it_ _even possible_ _for_ _a_ _cold_ _color to_ _be_ _warm?_ Sasuke wondered) of his maid.

"What are you doing on top of me?" the prince spluttered.

"I thought you might not want to be Prince Pancake," Aoko explained, pushing herself up with one arm. "I… oh…" The prince followed her gaze to the small black velvet box that lay on the sidewalk about a foot away. It was wide open, and bits of colored glass littered the ground near it. Aoko sat up suddenly, crawling off the prince, as her wide eyes stuck to the box.

"Well, happy birthday," the prince said from the ground. So much for that idea. He stood up with a sigh and began brushing himself off, ignoring the light dusting of rain that he got for having no umbrella. He looked down at Aoko, who was still staring at the box on the ground. He sighed once more, but before he could say anything, Aoko's face broke out into a smile. The next thing he knew, Aoko was on her feet, and her arms were around him.

"Thank you!" she exclaimed, grinning from ear to ear, as though her birthday present was dangling from her neck and not in shards on the ground.

"That's going to be me in a minute," the prince wheezed. Aoko let go quickly, laughing.

"I'm sorry, I'm just so… well, I don't know what to say. Thank you so, so much. I'm sure it was very pretty, and I would've worn it right now," she said eagerly, looking back down at the colored glass. "Wow… a present from a prince, huh? I'll never forget this birthday."

Sasuke didn't quite understand. Wasn't it in pieces? Wasn't the present ruined? The beaming smile on Aoko's face was just how he had imagined it, if not better, but why was she smiling if she didn't have anything?

"Well, whatever," the prince grumbled, more in answer to his own questions. "Let's head back to the castle. That was it. And don't you dare tell anyone, okay? I found it lying around and thought you might want it, because I have no use for that kind of junk."

"Thank you, really," Aoko said. The prince met her laughing eyes, and before he could answer, he was encased in another bone-crushing hug. The prince didn't understand that either. It was a one-handed hug! How the heck did she get so much force in a one-handed hug?

"Smile," Aoko whispered. The prince's frown deepened. "You're rich. You're handsome," she continued. "Someday everything you see—"

"Will be mine, I know," the prince interrupted. "What do you mean by that?"

"And you've made someone happy," Aoko said, stepping back and tweaking his nose with light fingers as if he were a little child. "So smile. You've got nothing to frown about. Life is short. Embrace youth, enjoy your freedom."

"Now you sound like Sir Guy," the prince grumbled, but even he had to admit that he maybe smiled a very little bit. Aoko grinned back at him.

"Much better. Now come on; let's head back. I should…"

Aoko stopped suddenly, her smile replaced by a frown. She looked up, over the prince's shoulder. The prince's face broke into a frown as well.

"What's wrong?" he demanded. Aoko was silent for a moment.

"Birds," she murmured.

"What about them?" the prince asked, a terrible sense of foreboding coming over him. Aoko met his eyes, but her eyes were no longer smiling. She looked worried, and… scared.

"There are no birds," she said, her voice no more than a whisper. The prince was about to answer, but suddenly Aoko snatched his arm. The next thing he knew, the prince was being pulled along at an impossible speed, with Aoko's hand tight around his arm. A gunshot followed, breaking into the window and shattering the glass.

"We're lucky there's no one around," Aoko said, panting, as she bit the bandage wrapped around her right arm and yanked with her teeth, unraveling the fabric.

"What are you doing?" the prince demanded, but his eyes were wide in disbelieving understanding.

"My right hand is my dominate hand," Aoko replied as she yanked him down an alleyway. More gunshots followed, ricocheting off of the bricks and garbage can that sat by the entrance. Aoko pushed the prince's head down as another shot rang out. "I use my sword in my right hand," Aoko continued, leaving the alley and pulling the prince down an abandoned street.

"You use what?" the prince asked, startled. In reply, Aoko dropped her right hand and yanked at her skirt. The skirt tore with a loud ripping sound, and the prince turned bright pink before he realized she wore a second skirt, tighter than the first and with knee-length leggings underneath. He didn't know how he could've missed it, but a katana was strapped to her leg. She drew it firmly with her right hand and spun around, sliding to a stop, as she pulled the prince behind her with her left hand.

"Now's not the time for a full explanation, but I can give you a quick one," she said, her eyes darting around expectantly for signs of the enemy. "I was hired by your father to protect you from your older brother. Your life has been in danger for the better part of a few months now. I am a professional; I work for the Guild of Warriors."

"Then you're a ninja?" the prince asked, his eyes wide. Aoko glanced after him, a light smile on her lips.

"I like to think of myself more as a really badass accountant," she replied. "Now go, run! Get back to the castle. Hopefully I can hold them off."

"It's a sword against guns!" the prince said, waving his arms helplessly.

"Have you ever seen Indiana Jones?" Aoko asked, looking away from him.

"Um… maybe," the prince said, confused.

"Well, all _he_ had was a whip. Now get going! Fast! I'll meet you back at the castle," Aoko said. A dark shape appeared at the end of the street, and Aoko cursed. "Just stand back," she warned, pushing him hard and bringing her other hand up to grip the hilt of her katana. "Whatever you do, don't you _dare_ get involved."

"So, so, so," said a familiar cold voice that sent chills up Sasuke's spine and sent his mind into a state of shock. His eyes widened as the red shapes of clouds appeared in the humid air left by that morning's downpour.

"Funny," the voice continued. "I thought you said you'd never get involved with girls, Sasuke-chan. Adorable as always, I see. You still haven't lost all your baby fat."

"Itachi Uchiha," Aoko called. "By the royal decree of April 23rd, you are banished to the Land of Rice Paddies for an attempt on the king's life. By coming back to Konoha, you have been sentenced to death. I am authorized to take your life. Do you understand?"

"I didn't ask you," Itachi said coolly. "I was talking to my brother. We're having a very nice little reunion. Please stay out of this."

Aoko's hand tightened on the hilt.

"Do you understand?" she repeated, gritting her teeth. Itachi didn't reply. Before the prince even realized what was happening, Aoko was off with a splash, her sword held at the ready, flying across the ground towards Itachi. Itachi brought a knife up to meet her katana. There was a _clang_ as the blades met.

"I guess I'll just have to take care of you first," Itachi murmured, pulling his sword away. In a flash, he disappeared and reappeared across the street. Aoko's ear twitched as the very faint sound of a gun cocking met her ears. She dove aside just as there was an explosion where she had been standing only moments before. She charged at Itachi, and the prince's eyes could not follow the speed of the two blades as the blurs of shape fought.

They broke apart once more, Aoko whirling to a stop. She looked down at her arm, the one that had been injured weeks before. The wound had reopened from a long slice across her skin from Itachi's blade. He smiled slightly at this, and then frowned as a handful of his hair fluttered to the ground. Blood dripped down his forehead.

"Touché," Itachi murmured, wiping his hand across his forehead. Aoko smiled.

"Seems we're equally matched," she said.

"Wrong," Itachi replied. "You see, I have my men."

Aoko whipped around as shadows detached themselves from the sides of the building behind Sasuke. The prince whipped around as the two men crept up on him. Within moments, Aoko had appeared back at his side, her sword held in her left hand and her right holding the prince protectively.

"What a way to spend a birthday," Aoko said wryly. "Your older brother is a real party pooper, huh? Oh, well."

"Father will have your head," Sasuke warned, his hands balling into fists as he glowered at his older brother. Itachi shrugged.

"Every story has to have a bad guy," he said.

"Yes, but does he have to be so cute?" Aoko asked aloud. "I mean, would it be too much to ask to have some old man to fight? It'd be a mite easier then, I daresay, rather than having to kill an attractive young man."

"Pay attention," Sasuke snapped.

"Easy for you to say," Aoko retorted. "I'll bet you've never had this problem. To mar or not to mar, that is the question…" Without warning, she shot forward, leaving Sasuke momentarily unprotected, and brought her sword around full-force into Itachi's. He wasn't fast enough, and he had to duck rather than block it. Aoko responded with a roundhouse kick that landed neatly at his chin and sent him flying. "To mar," she said cheerfully. Then she was back at Sasuke's side, with her sword in the chest of the man who had begun to attack.

"You need to get back to the castle, my lord," Aoko said, turning to the young prince as she straightened up and the man slid off her sword. The prince was staring in horror at the bloodied katana. "Once you get back to the castle, the guards can protect you," Aoko continued, talking while she took down another man. "I can't hold them off for forever while protecting you. You'll need to—"

Sasuke whirled around. Itachi was up and heading straight for him, his weapon at the ready. Aoko yanked Sasuke out of the way and brought her sword up to meet Itachi's, but this time it was her turn to be caught off guard. Her sword spun out of her hands. Without a choice, she ducked under Itachi, pulling Sasuke with her, pushed the prince to the side, and dove for her sword.

As she was coming up, sword in hand, there was a twanging sound, followed shortly by the tearing sound of cloth. The prince was frozen on his knees where he had fallen, his eyes wide. He saw the arrow make contact with her flesh, he saw the blood drip from her mouth, and he saw her fall in slow motion to the ground. His mind was blank. He could no longer fathom what happened in front of him. It has to be a dream, he thought. There's no way it can be real. He fell to his knees, into the water, as though following her descent.

She hit the ground with a splash, and the prince felt the cold ripples from the puddle reach his knees. His eyes stayed locked on his best friend who lay broken on the ground, her eyes vacant. Her mouth was open in a silent scream, and the feathered shaft of the arrow was just level with the ground. Her arm dangled limply at her side, her hand still tightly closed around her katana as her fingers trembled slightly, whether because of the pain or because of postmortem muscle spasms, the prince could not tell.

The prince was numb. He could feel nothing, think nothing. All he could do was watch, standing frozen. She had given her life for him, for the person who had made her life miserable. How could he forget that? How could he ever forgive himself, now that she was gone because of him? Feeling returned to his limbs, and he paid no mind to the tears that coursed down his face as he crawled on his hands and knees, trembling, to her side.

He looked up at his brother, who held a crossbow in his hands. Somehow Itachi had planned this, just how it had played out. Somehow he had had a concealed weapon all along, something with enough force at point-blank range to kill with one well-placed blow. Sasuke set his jaw, trembling with rage.

"Fine," he said with barely contained anger and obvious contempt. "It seems I'll have to take out this garbage myself. Prepare yourself, _brother_."

"Oh?" Itachi asked as he dropped the crossbow and pulled out his own sword. The wooden weapon clattered to the ground as the blade glinted in the gray light. "You really think you can now, or have you forgotten all those times I beat you in swordplay in the courtyard? You always have been worthless, you know – nothing more than a little child who went crying to his mother whenever he was disarmed."

"Those were games," Sasuke retorted. He looked back down at Aoko's hand, and then reached for her sword, gently releasing her cold fingers from the hilt. He stood up to face his brother, Aoko's sword in his hands. "Where are your men now, I wonder?" he sneered.

"They have their orders," Itachi replied. "I told them to leave you alone. I wanted to take care of you myself. Your kind of scum is only slightly better than some commoner scum, as that of a peasant maid."

"She wasn't actually a maid, you know," Sasuke pointed out. "Maybe she was the duchess's third cousin once removed. Everybody's an illegitimate noble these days."

Itachi quirked a smile.

"I see she rubbed off on you somewhat," he said. "You were never so witty."

"I was seven," Sasuke snarled. His grip tightened on the sword. "Enough talk. I've wanted to do this for a while now."

"What, die by the hand of your older brother?" Itachi teased, holding his arms wide. "Come to my arms, brother! I'll give you the first hit on the house. You'll need it."

In reply, Sasuke charged. He would wipe that smile right off of his brother's face.

Their blades met.

"What happened to a free hit?" Sasuke asked indignantly. His brother's teeth glinted as he smiled, his sword held casually with one hand to block Sasuke's two-handed strike.

"I changed my mind," he said, and his other hand appeared.

Sasuke felt arms around his chest, and the next thing he knew, a knife flashed under his nose as he was pulled backward. He heard the labored breathing by his ear, he could feel the weight of his savior struggling to stay upright, and he knew who it was before he even turned around.

"Please let me handle this, my lord," she whispered. "This… is my job. I get paid for this, believe it or not. You need to… to get back to the castle as quickly as possible."

"And leave you? Of course not," Sasuke snapped, shaking her off. "I'll take care of this, and you get back to the castle and get the doctor!"

"It's nice of you to suggest it," Aoko replied, putting a hand on his shoulder to hold him back. "But I don't think… that you could, even if you… if you tried." She coughed and put a hand to her mouth as she doubled over in pain, blood slipping through her fingers.

"In a movie I'd just stand here until you finished," Itachi said from the sidelines. "Sadly, this is reality. I don't need to tell you to prepare yourself, so—"

"Shut up, you bastard," Aoko growled. Her hand, slippery with her own blood, grasped Sasuke's and the sword was slipped from his hand. Sasuke looked up at her in horror as she pulled him back behind herself with her arm, in the same position she had been moments before she had fallen.

"I am a prince, you know," Itachi spat, holding his own sword high.

"Yeah," Aoko said in mock agreement. "You're a prince, and I'm the sun goddess."

She dove forward unsteadily and their swords met once more. Her eyes were somewhat dull, and she was trying to focus even though her vision was failing her.

"Fire style," Itachi said. Aoko broke away and leaped over Sasuke, pinning him to the ground, as a burst of flames singed her clothing just a little too close for comfort. _Flames_ _in_ _the_ _rain_, Aoko thought somewhat distantly. _How_ _ironic_.

"Okay," Aoko said finally, getting unsteadily to her feet and swaying slightly. "I guess… it's only fair if I get to do some cool stuff too, so… here goes."

She smiled somewhat sadly. "Take care of yourself, my lord," she murmured. Sasuke looked up at her quickly, but he could only see her back. "Smile," she continued. "You're rich, you're handsome. Someday… soon… everything you see will be yours."

Like lightning, she raced forward, and somehow Sasuke knew that this was the last time. There was a flash of light, and Sasuke covered his eyes as he was momentarily blinded. In the flash of light, he could've sworn he saw an angel smiling down at him before everything just as suddenly went black.


	4. In Which The End Comes Too Soon

Sasuke's eyes opened slightly. His hair immediately assaulted his eyeball, and he raised a heavy hand to brush away his bangs. As soon as the memories came flooding back, he sat up with a start, looking around for Aoko.

"Aoko?" he called. "Aoko! Where are you?"

The entire street was empty, the cobblestones dry. The prince wondered how long he had been lying there. He got to his feet and trotted down the road, looking around desperately for any sign of Aoko.

"Would you look at that," he heard. He whipped around, half-hoping and half-apprehensive. The dark figure leaning against the alley corner couldn't possibly be Aoko, he thought. Dark, wet hair hung over its pale face, its clothes were hanging in tatters, and blood dripped down its right arm. The prince's eyes were wide.

"I'd like to say that I transported him to the sun or something," the figure continued, stepping forward. It fell to its knees. "Sadly, I think I only managed the middle of Mount Fuji."

Then, without another word, the figure collapsed, landing with a dull thud on the street. Sasuke took a step forward, then another. Within moments, he was running to her side. He fell to his knees beside the broken figure and rolled her over. Her hair fell out of her face, which was somewhat serene, with seventeen years of laugh lines etched into the corners of her eyes. In case you've never seen seventeen years of laugh lines before, it was surprisingly unimpressive.

The prince put his head on her chest, listening for a heartbeat. As far as he could tell, there was nothing, not even a little flutter like a butterfly with a broken wing. His hands trembled as he straightened his elbows and began to administer CPR. Somewhere inside, he felt that it was futile, but he needed to try. There was still no response. She was gone forever.

The prince sat back. He pulled up his sleeves. He shoved his arms under her body and was able to awkwardly get her pulled over his back. Her chin dug into his shoulder, and he winced as he slowly straightened up. It was awkward, uncomfortable, and probably embarrassing, but he didn't have time to care. He started walking in the general direction of the castle. Who knew? Maybe the doctor could do something for her.

* * *

The prince sat with his head supported by his hand, staring out at the bright morning. Aoko was still alive, thank heavens, but the doctor hadn't been able to give him a good answer. 'Maybe' wasn't good enough. She was in a coma, and the doctor said that if she didn't wake up within the next week, the chances were that they'd lose her. Her body was slow to heal.

He closed his eyes momentarily. How had it gotten like this? Only a matter of weeks ago, he had found the smiling new maid at his fireplace on a bad morning. When had he started thinking of her as a friend? He didn't know any more. All he knew now was that she was his friend, and that he had to do something so that she'd never be gone. She couldn't be gone, not when he needed her. Firstly, he had some laundry that needed doing. His towel tortoise had fallen apart and Aoko needed to refold it. He wasn't going to tell anyone that he had slept with it the night before. It smelled something like her, although it could've been his imagination.

He hadn't seen her since he brought her to the doctor. She had looked bad enough without the bandages and a heart monitor. He couldn't bring himself to visit. He wasn't sure he could make it out without losing his composure, which absolutely could not happen.

The door opened quietly.

"Your tea, my lord," said the voice of his newest maid. His father knew that he needed a maid, and his father didn't understand, so the prince had some new girl acting as his maid. He glanced back at her. She was somewhat pretty, but not nearly as beautiful as Aoko.

"Set it over there," he said. The maid put it down by him where he had indicated, bowed, and left, the door shutting quietly behind her.

The prince touched the side of the cup and held his hand there for a moment. He brought his hand away. Aoko had been the only one to ever bring the tea at the perfect temperature. He put his finger in his mouth, for it burned. He stared at the teacup for a moment.

He brought his arm down on the tray, and the tea splashed over the wall. The prince stood up and stormed across the room. He slammed open the door and marched down the hall, past the surprised maid who had left only moments before. He marched all the way out the front door, across the courtyard, and around the back to the garden. Perhaps a walk through some flowers would help clear his mind or stop making him feel so… strangled. He could barely breathe in there, although it was probably just him.

He stopped suddenly when the sound of laughter filled his ears. He scowled, catching sight of a group of girls on a picnic blanket in the middle of the garden. He recognized a couple of them. Some were maids, the gardener's apprentice (gardener now) was there as well as the physician's apprentice, who was sitting right next to a girl with long dark hair and her right arm in a cast. They were all laughing. The prince blinked as the girl with dark hair turned around and spotted him, a smile dancing on her lips.

"Well," said Aoko. "Are you going to join us, my lord, or are you still scared of the ground, in which case I shall have to challenge you to a game of Truth or Dare first?"

There was a moment of warm silence. The other girls were winking at and nudging their friends; Ino and Sakura, the gardener and physician's apprentice, were both giggling at each other quietly, and then there was Aoko's smile, brighter and warmer than the sun itself. The sun filtered through her dark hair, and her face, which had regained its tanned tinge, was rosy-cheeked. The prince didn't have a choice. As much as he hated taking a previous order from a maid, this time it was acceptable.

And a real smile broke out on the prince's face for the first time in a very, very long time.

* * *

~ Epilogue ~

* * *

Prince Sasuke was crowned king a few years later with the death of his father. No one heard any word of Itachi and soon the name was forgotten, although there was probably a wild-haired insane hermit living on the edge of Mount Fuji at some point. Aoko didn't technically become the queen, so the court had to come up with an official term for the king's wife even though she was a commoner. The sort-of-queen herself chose the official term, and so from then on in the land of Konoha, if a king married a commoner and the villagers didn't feel the need to call her a queen, she was simply deemed a really badass accountant.

* * *

~ The End ~


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